Faramir Fiction Archive

War of the Wizards (PG)

15 July 2010 | 120215 words | Work in Progress

Title: War of the Wizards
Author: KC
Rating: PG
Pairing(s): Faramir
Warnings: Spanking
Disclaimer: The characters are not mine. They belong to Tolkien.<br>,Please let me know what you think of this story by leaving a comment.

This is number seven in the series that started with Grief, Elf, Wasps and an Angry Wizard and Stubborn Stewards and Bright Red Paddles, Human King, Elven King & One Stubborn Steward, Sweet Revenge or Let Licking Dogs Lie and Elves, Orcs and the Road to Recovery.
Added: Chapter 52

Part 32

The rest of the day proved uneventful as Faramir continued his tutelage under Elrond and Gandalf. As had become the pattern for the Steward of Gondor, soon after eating the midday meal of cheese, bread and fruit in his mother’s garden, he fell asleep in a nest of blankets under his tree. The twins were not seen for the rest of the day, assumed generally to be plotting.

It was not until the following morning that it became evident that the twins had indeed spent the previous day plotting, when a mighty bellow, such as could only belong to the bellows… lungs… of a dwarf, rent the air within the Steward’s wing of the palace. Faramir, Amrothos, Legolas and of course, Misto, were in the antechamber that led to the entrances of the Steward’s apartments and guest apartments about to make their way to the King’s Private dining room when the bellow sounded. They turned towards the entrance to where Gimli was staying in time to see the dwarf, dripping wet, dressed in nothing but his leggings and a loose fitting under-tunic, wielding his lethal battle-axe and looking extremely… green. His hair, beard, face, forearms, hairy chest and bare feet were all a vivid green, a green not seen in nature. Human and elven eyes all widened in astonishment at the state of the dwarf and at the growing number of green drips forming a puddle on the floor beneath the dwarf. Amrothos thought, rather irreverently, that it certainly put paid to the general belief that dwarves were averse to immersing their entire bodies when bathing.

“Let me at ‘em. I will kill yon twin beasties!” Gimli roared. “One smirk out of ye, laddie… “ he added on seeing the twinkle in Legolas’ eyes, leaving the threat of painful physical chastisement hanging.

Faramir managed to dispossess the angry dwarf of his axe by reminding him, in his normal, calm, quiet, conversational tone, as he tugged on the axe trying to loosen Gimli’s grip, of the relationship between the twins and the Lady Galadriel; with whom he knew the dwarf was besotted.

The commotion brought Thranduil, Imrahil, Maglor and Boromir, who made his usual entrance through a solid wall, upon the astonishing scene, emerging from the apartments in which they were residing or in Boromir’s case; wherever he had been haunting last. Thranduil looked sharply at Maglor who retuned a rather coy shrug. It was obvious to the elven King that his Seneschal had been aware of the prank and had allowed it to play out.

Faramir, still holding the battle-axe, kept making strange choking sounds not helped by Boromir’s booming laughter and comments about walking vegetables and this was as close as the dwarf would ever come to eating his greens.

“Please, excuse me Gimli,” Faramir managed to choke out before handing Legolas the battle-axe, turning on his heels and all but bolting out of the room and through the open door leading to his own chambers.

“What is that laddie’s problem?” Gimli asked, obviously confused.

“I will find out,” Amrothos offered in the same strange choked voice before he too bolted in the same direction Faramir had taken, Boromir’s laughter following him.

“Humans!” Gimli exclaimed, perplexed.

The rest of what he was about to say was interrupted by Aragorn’s entrance, the King’s eyes widening comically as he tried to comprehend his friend’s current intensely green state. Aragorn started making similar noises to those made by Faramir and Amrothos.

“That way, Estel” Thranduil said, pointing in the direction taken by his son, his eyes twinkling as he watched Aragorn also bolt from the room without so much as an acknowledgement or thank you.

“Well!” the green dwarf huffed.

“Come, Master Gimli,” Maglor sighed. “Let us see if we can cure you of that very… fetching colour,” he added, guiding Gimli back into the dwarf’s chambers, sparing a ‘put upon’ look for Thranduil as he passed him.

As soon as dwarf and elf disappeared into the chamber, Imrahil burst out into peals laughter so hard that tears streamed down his face. It was not long before the human’s laughter was accompanied by the tinkling laughter of elves.

“As old as Arda or not, that elf is positively evil at times,” Imrahil managed to say when his laughter had abated somewhat.

“Yes… well… you must understand that there is a bit of history between the dwarves and the elves of Mirkwood, not made any easier by the rather… unique… perceptions of a certain hobbit,” Thranduil replied enigmatically, looking askance at Legolas, whose eyes twinkled as brightly as his adas.

“_Do_ tell,” Imrahil encouraged as he led Thranduil and Legolas out f the antechamber, into the hallway and towards the King’s private dining room.

Thranduil related the story of Bilbo Baggins and the dwarves from the elven perspective, which was decidedly different from that of the hobbit. Knowing Thranduil as well as he did now through their mutual love of Faramir, Imrahil found it difficult to reconcile the version of events as detailed in Bilbo’s book with what Thranduil had just told him. Although he had a great deal of respect for the hobbit and his nephew, Frodo, he was not blind to a hobbit’s propensity for embellishing the truth on occasions, not Sam or Frodo but certainly Merry and Pippin… especially Master Took.

“So… Maglor knew what Bilbo was attempting and was there to ensure that he succeeded in getting the dwarves out of your fortress; thus getting you out of a delicate situation of your own making,” Imrahil summarised, causing Thranduil to wince.

“Yes… well… I and my temper do still have our moments, I must confess,” Thranduil replied sheepishly, eliciting a snort from Legolas. “He is still upset that Bilbo in his book depicted the Mirkwood elves as being avaricious and slightly backward, when, he had to clear the corridors constantly of elves who arrived on the scene to investigate the vast array of noises that the hobbit and dwarves kept making during the ‘escape’.”

“He was still giving ada dark looks and making pointed comments when I arrived back from patrol two days later,” Legolas sniggered.

Thranduil blushed remembering Maglor’s reaction to the whole affair. He had found sitting not to be a viable option for several days after the incident. Imrahil smirked seeing the elven King’s discomfiture, suspecting what Maglor’s response would have been and where it would have been registered most strongly.

The morning meal turned out to be an interesting affair. Gimli, looking less green, entered the room followed by Maglor. The dwarf glared at the twins before sitting down at the opposite end of the table beside Legolas who was seated at the table already. Gimli was not the only one glaring at the twins for Elrond, who had deduced immediately cause of the dwarf’s green tinge, glared at his sons and sent a look of reproach at the Mirkwood Seneschal, which Maglor chose to ignore. Despite the glares they received the twins looked very smug.

Aragorn, Faramir with Misto in tow and Amrothos entered the dining room looking fairly composed followed by Boromir who was still chortling merrily, much to the fox cubs’ annoyance as it made it more difficult for them to maintain their composures. Aragorn sat down beside Arwen who looked at her husband with suppressed mirth that made his own threaten to bubble to the surface again. Faramir and Amrothos sat down beside their respective fathers and tried not to look at Gimli. Misto scuttled off to Arwen to greet the she-elf, hoping to receive a caress from her in return.

Boromir enjoyed himself immensely as the watched all the surreptitious looks, amusement and glares that played out around the table. Faramir, Amrothos and Aragorn were working very hard in their attempts to maintain neutral expressions. Gimli and Elrond sent occasional glares towards the twins. The twins were deliberately fuelling the fires by continuing to smirk. Arwen’s eyes were filled with amusement and even Gandalf seemed to be enjoying the non-verbal messages flying around the table, his eyes looking very owlish as they looked from diner to diner.

At the conclusion of the morning meal Faramir followed his normal morning routine, first with Elrond and then Gandalf, after which he ate the midday meal in the garden and rested under his tree with Misto ensconced in his web above until he saw something that interested him, descended the tree on a thread and scuttled off towards the palace; being careful not to wake his mama.

Emboldened by their success with the prank on Gimli, the twins sought out Legolas to have a little fun intimidating the wood elf. They managed to corner Legolas in a room, the windows of which looked out upon the garden in which Faramir was sleeping. The twins stalked towards Legolas with predatory expressions designed to make the wood elf wary. Just as they reached Legolas they were startled by the sudden and silent appearance of Misto, dangling on a thread, between them and their prey having descended from the rafter above.

“Mine!” Misto exclaimed. “My baaaddd elf! Go ‘way!” he hissed in warning trying to look as menacing as possible, which given how much he had grown was quite menacing indeed.

Elven eyes, including those of Legolas, widened as they all stared at the baby spider in astonishment.

“Mama!” Misto said focussing on a point behind the twins who stood in front of him, causing the twins to turn in the direction the spider was looking expecting to see Faramir but seeing only Amrothos in the hallway at the entrance to the room.

When they turned back again both Misto and Legolas were gone. Legolas had used Misto’s thread to pull himself up onto the rafter and Misto had followed him. Legolas ran along the rafter and dropped down near Amrothos who had witnessed the entire scene and had been ready to intervene if Legolas needed assistance. Misto continued on his way out of the room towards his mama, cackling; a sound that sent shivers up the spines of human and elves. The twins, having been thwarted in their intimidation of Legolas, exited the room via the balcony to return to their plotting.

“I thought that he did not like you?” Amrothos remarked, looking puzzled as he watched the spider scuttle out of the room.

“I think that he is of the belief that he, and he only, has the right to annoy and torment me,” Legolas sighed resigned, eliciting a chuckle from Amrothos.

“He is remarkably sneaky, for such a young creature that is,” Amrothos said.

“Aye… he is,” Legolas mused, looking thoughtful. “More so than is known in his species, generally.”

“Aye, but remember to whom he is allied and how sneaky Fara can be” Amrothos smiled.

“You do not do badly yourself, cousin,” Legolas retorted.

“Aye, but everything I have learned, I have learned from him and our grandfather,” Amrothos replied.

After the sun had set and prior to the evening meal, Elrond, Gandalf, Imrahil and Thranduil were enjoying a friendly and lively discussion in the drawing room of the apartment that Elrond shared with the twins. The conversation came to an abrupt halt when the twins entered the room, expressions as dark as thunderclouds, covered with what looked like oil and reeking of a floral perfume, followed by Maglor who was smiling broadly. Elrond raised an eyebrow in question at the twins, his nose wrinkling at the power of the floral smell, a question they chose not to answer as they disappeared through a doorway that led through to their bathing chamber.

“Under the cover of darkness they attempted to rig a large leather bladder filled with highly perfumed oil in the branches in the tree under which Faramir sleeps…” Maglor began in response to the questioning looks he received.

“Let me guess. The tree warned Faramir,” Thranduil interjected.

“Aye. I am still not certain myself where he was but as the twins were standing on the ground attempting to hoist the bladder into the tree by use of a rope over a branch, two arrows from a long bow hit the bladder. The weight of the water tore the thin leather… “ Maglor continued only to be interrupted again.

“The contents of which emptied onto my elflings below,” Elrond said, shaking his head. “I do hope they did not purloin any of Arwen’s perfume or she will have their guts for garters.”

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