Faramir Fiction Archive

Only if… (NC-17)

Written by Sairalinde and Anorienbean

29 June 2007 | 85653 words

Chapter 9

Days passed before Faramir stopped treating Haldir as if he were made of glass. If anyone thought it was strange that a master take care of their slave personally, no one spoke of it though even Elreath was surprised by the extent of Faramir’s devotion.

Almost two full weeks passed before Haldir was completely healed and even then Faramir was careful in the way he touched him. This went on for a few more days until Haldir asked if he were being punished for falling down the stairs like what happened in the marketplace that day months before. Surprised by the question, Faramir began treating Haldir the same as he had before, though he hadn’t begun giving Haldir ‘orders’ again. But in the last day or so it seemed Haldir had looked at him expectantly more than once, as if waiting for his master to tell him what he wanted.

With that thought in his mind all day, Faramir decided that they would return to their roles that night and was surprised when he walked into their room to find it empty. The door to the bath was closed and he smiled as he crossed the room. He was early after all, having thought all day about the way Haldir had looked at him just that morning and he’d hurried through his work. He opened the door quietly and smiled as he stood in the doorway watching silently. He knew Haldir sensed him the moment he’d opened the door but the Elf hadn’t looked up at him yet. Instead he stepped out of the tub, and reached for a towel. Water was running down his body and pooling at his feet. No more bruises marred his beautiful skin, and Faramir’s mouth began to water at the thought of licking the fresh taste of the water from Haldir’s skin. “No,” the words were spoken softly. “Don’t cover up.”

The corners of Haldir’s mouth twitched as he tried not to smile at his master’s words. If he hadn’t been a slave, he wouldn’t have craved the direction so much…or so he thought. In some ways, though, he had to admit, it was kind of erotic to be told exactly what your lover wanted. Letting the towel drop to the floor, Haldir simply gave a slight nod of understanding, sensing that things were getting back to normal. Sometimes, in the privacy of their own rooms, he teased Faramir, laughed with him, or was allowed to torture him with dozens of kisses. Tonight though, he was the perfect slave – obedient and submissive and ready to do absolutely anything Faramir wanted. Gods… what has gotten in to me? Why is making him happy the only thing I can think of? Telling himself that he was merely taking pride in the job that had been forced upon him, he stood naked and dripping before his lover, letting his golden hair frame his face and his eyes stay fixed on the ground at his feet. The mere thought of things going back to normal was making him aroused already, and he could only hope that would please Faramir, because there simply wasn’t much he could do about it at the moment.

Faramir licked his lips as Haldir obeyed him so easily and it was plain to see that the Elf was eagerly anticipating what would happen. His eyes followed a large drop of water traveling down Haldir’s chest, down perfectly formed muscles, to his stomach and lower. “Get on your knees,” he said clearly. When he saw Haldir begin to look up at him, he shook his head. “Don’t look up at me until I tell you to.”

Again, Haldir had to bite back a smile, but he got to his knees as directed. “Yes, my Lord,” he murmured as his skin touched the cold stone floor and he rested his backside against his heels. His erection, meanwhile, was cooperating nicely, filling and growing thicker with every passing moment.

Smiling as Haldir followed his orders, Faramir could feel his arousal growing even more and his next words were spoken huskily as he continued with his orders. “With my next order you will look up at me,” he said softly and saw Haldir nod. “Crawl to me, slowly,” he whispered already breathing heavily himself. With that order, Faramir began to unlace his own tunic though, as Haldir looked up at him and their eyes met, he found he couldn’t move. All he could do was watch his slave crawl to him, his body glistening with water, his muscles moving smoothly with each graceful move toward him.

Haldir’s breath caught in his throat, as he moved, no longer even aware of the rough stone floor beneath him, or the now cold water dripping from his skin. From the moment their gazes met, he was aware of nothing and no one but the man before him. He wondered what Faramir saw as he moved closer, and moaned softly as he saw his own need mirrored in the blue eyes of this Ranger who commanded him. Feeling the flesh between his legs getting heavy and fuller, he forced himself to move slowly, and with great deliberation, completely unaware of the image he presented. He moved as slowly as possible, never breaking their gaze, and licked at his lips, wanting Faramir to know that he wanted him…and not because he had to.

Faramir bit back a moan as he saw Haldir lick at his lips and still keeping his eyes on the erotic vision before him, he quickly unlaced his tunic and toed off his boots. His breeches were becoming decidedly uncomfortable, but he waited to remove them. When Haldir was only about a foot away from him, Faramir cleared his throat before ordering him to stop. Instead of giving in to his base desire and asking his slave to pleasure him with his mouth, he stepped forward, and circled the prone form. Even like this Haldir looked elegant and proud. He walked around his lover and leaned down to let his fingertips trail over his back, feeling the cool damp skin against the pads of his fingers before moving down to a perfect backside. He grinned when Haldir seemed to arch into his touch and let his palm slide down his backside a little before moving away again and looking at him from behind. He simply drank in the soft fall of golden hair across his shoulders, some spilling down his back, the rest hanging forward and framing his face. His eyes moved down the curve of his back, loving the way the muscles there were sculpted from centuries of bow and swordplay. “You are exceptionally beautiful, Haldir,” he whispered softly as his hands lowered to his breeches. He unlaced them with unsteady hands and managed to take them off in a matter of seconds. For a moment he simply watched Haldir, knowing his lover didn’t know what Faramir’s next order might be. Lowering himself to his knees behind Haldir he hardly felt the cold wet floor beneath him and he allowed his hands to touch again. Splaying them against his lover’s lower back and waist Faramir dragged them lower over his backside and grinned as he felt muscles tremble.

Haldir’s body reacted to Faramir’s touch immediately – not out of training or force of habit though – simply out of pure, unadulterated desire. His legs parted and his hands clenched into fists on the floor, and he had to bite his bottom lip to keep from speaking, or moaning, or pleading with Faramir not to stop. He did, however, allow himself to roll his hips, offering himself to his lover and pushing back against his hands. Even now, after all these months, he was still surprised at how readily he reacted to Faramir’s touch. So many of the other slaves in Gondor had to simply endure their master’s touch, or pretend to enjoy it as they thought of someone else. But that had never been the case with Faramir. Even in their first days as master and slave, Haldir, once he had accepted their positions, had loved being touched by this man who had claimed him and denied him his freedom. That didn’t even seem to matter any more, he thought, as he was no longer obsessing over how many days of slavery he had left before he could return to his home. In fact, he rarely even gave it much thought. He sighed as strong, gentle hands moved over his skin, and couldn’t resist pushing back again, inviting Faramir to take more, to take everything.

Smiling at the way Haldir reacted to his touch, Faramir continued to simply let his hands roam over his skin for a few more minutes, and then he leaned closer brushing his lips against his lower back. Kisses were pressed against his spine, the curve of a hip, dragging his beard across the pale skin and then his teeth. The shiver the action produced made him grin again and he kissed lower, nipping with his teeth at his lover’s backside. He almost laughed at the way Haldir’s body would move away at first, a tiny jump but then press back as if begging for more. Dragging his hands lower, he parted the smooth cheeks and leaned closer, letting his breath ghost against the sensitive flesh before licking around the puckered entrance. The immediate reaction that was drawn from his lover, encouraged Faramir and he pressed his tongue forward into the tight opening. He’d never done this with another, had no desire to, but he seemed to want everything with Haldir. Perhaps because he knew their time was so short? Pushing the thought away, he delved deeper, feeling the tight muscle relax around his tongue.

Leaning forward to rest his head on his arms, Haldir whimpered in both surprise and pleasure as his body was breached by what could only be Faramir’s tongue. The wet muscle pressed insistently against him and the shivering Elf felt the wrinkled skin of his entrance stretch and give way, the mere thought of what was being done to him causing little darts of pleasure to shoot through his entire body. “By the Valar…” he muttered softly and cursed under his breath. He’d never had this done to him before, and Gods, it felt incredible, knowing that Faramir wanted him that way. Fighting the urge to reach down and touch himself, he closed his eyes and concentrated on breathing even as his hips began to rock back and forth against Faramir’s wicked mouth, praying that he wouldn’t stop anytime soon.

Encouraged by the reaction Haldir had, Faramir continued pressing forward into him and then withdrawing to lick around the tight muscle before delving inside again. After several moments he added a finger, stretching the muscle even more. His own arousal was dripping slick fluid onto the marble floor, but he ignored the insistent throb to continue drawing the wonderful sounds from his lover his actions seemed to produce. He’d never heard Haldir like this, they’d made love so many times and many ways but he’d never drawn such audible reactions from him before. Finally drawing away, he kissed and nipped at Haldir’s hip, his finger continuing to move within him, as his other hand moved down to fondle and touch his lover and caress the insides of his thighs. “Gods, I always think I can’t possibly want you more than the day before but each day I prove myself wrong,” he whispered.

You are proving more than yourself wrong. Haldir didn’t say the words, but they rang loud and clear in his head. Those thoughts were easily pushed aside in favor of other, more pleasant feelings, however, as Faramir’s finger moved deep inside him, the tight ring of muscles gripping the digit almost desperately, still warm and wet and wonderfully open from the probing tongue that had just prepared him. Faramir’s other hand between his thighs was so tender and soothing that Haldir felt a fierce wave of protectiveness wash over him, along with the need to give Faramir as much pleasure as he always seemed so willing to give. Haldir was so focused on the incredible sensations his lover was causing, he didn’t even realize that he was whispering Faramir’s name again and again under his breath as he continued to rock back and forth.

Curling his finger, searching for that perfect spot inside him, Faramir smiled as Haldir arched and cried out when his finger brushed against it. Unable to wait any longer, Faramir drew back, and dragged Haldir against him. His aching arousal pressed against his lover, slick with his own fluids, and he thrust forward slowly into the now relaxed opening. He whispered his lover’s name as he leaned down kissing Haldir’s back, while he pressed in deeper. Faramir almost blurted out what he felt for the amazing Elf he’d fallen so deeply in love with, and was grateful his lips had been occupied. His arms wrapped around the perfect body beneath him and he sat back on his heels, pulling Haldir up into his lap, driving himself deeper inside. “You make me want things I never imagined,” he whispered honestly, though Haldir was likely to think he only meant pleasure but Faramir meant so much more.

As he was slowly impaled and pulled back against Faramir’s body, Haldir moaned in pure bliss and tilted his head back to lie on his lover’s shoulder. One arm reached behind him, winding around his master’s neck, while the other rested over Faramir’s hands and entwined their fingers. “And you have made me imagine things I never even knew I wanted,” he murmured as the final inch of the swollen flesh pushing up inside him slid in even deeper. Turning his head to the side, he pulled Faramir closer and sealed their lips together, sucking on his lover’s tongue and shifting his hips to make the rigid organ delving deep in his passage rub over his sweet spot.

Faramir’s heart skipped when Haldir kissed him so passionately as their bodies moved as one. His mind went completely blank except for what they were sharing, and at least he could pretend that this was more than it was. More than a slave simply giving himself over to his master. He could pretend in his mind that this was so much more, though he knew he would regret it later when Haldir left in a few months. With that thought, Faramir kissed him more passionately wanting to brand into his memory and perhaps Haldir’s as well, what they had now. His body moved, thrusting up into the body that gripped him so tightly, Gods it was as if they were simply made for each other though he knew the notion was silly. His hand slid from under one of Haldir’s down his chest to his stomach and lower, to the slick shaft that was curved up from between his lover’s legs. He stroked him, matching the pace their bodies set, and finally drew away from the kiss. When Haldir opened his eyes, Faramir wondered at what he saw there, certain he was foolishly imagining things and looked away.

In that moment, Haldir belonged to Faramir, both in body and in soul, and he gave more of himself than he ever had before. Some part of him that he didn’t even know existed wanted to hold on to this moment, when they were truly lovers, nothing more and nothing less, and cherish it forever. He moved up and down on the thick shaft, his fingers curled in Faramir’s hair and his breath was lost in their kiss. The hand on his sex moved in perfect rhythm, just as Haldir’s own would have done, and he squeezed the long fingers tangled with his own tightly, trying to ground himself and hold on for as long as he could. Finally pulling away for air, he took only one breath before latching on to Faramir’s neck and sucking hard, wanting everyone to know that he was taken, even if it was only by a slave and only for a short time. He balls drew up against his body, and he tugged at Faramir’s hair as he cried out and thrust up into the fist surrounding him and back down on the organ inside him. “Close…so close…”

Moaning as Haldir sucked almost greedily at his neck, Faramir continued to move, thrusting deep. He felt Haldir’s body trembling on the edge, and bit his lip as he felt his own release building. He tried to hold on just a little longer, but simply couldn’t. With one last deep thrust he didn’t order but almost begged his lover breathlessly to come with him. His entire body seemed to go ridged as he spilled inside Haldir, crying out his name and hearing it echo in the small room. He pulled him closer, kissing him, stifling his moans and Haldir’s as well as they continued to move, each thrust slower than before. I love you, Gods, I love you more than I could possibly say, and I can never tell you.

As warmth filled him, Haldir came as well, spilling over the hand that was still stroking him so expertly. His arousal pulsed and twitched, his release spurting up onto his chest and stomach, and the soft, almost desperate moans and words that fell from his lips were held between them, not for any other to hear, sounds shared only between two lovers who hadn’t a care in the world at that very moment. Their orgasms seemed to last forever, but finally, when Haldir felt himself softening in Faramir’s hand, he relaxed fully back against him and began nuzzling against his neck, almost purring with contentment. “I would crawl to you any day of the week,” he said with a smile, letting the edge of his teeth graze over sweat-dampened skin, failing to mention that he would do it even if he weren’t a slave.

Faramir was completely spent; his breath was coming in harsh pants and gasps when they finally drew apart from this kiss. They’d had sex often since Haldir came into his life, but this felt like so much more. Though he knew he was the only one that felt that way, for one brief moment it had felt shared. When their hearts seemed to slow back to normal, Faramir laughed softly at Haldir’s words. “I wasn’t sure at first what my plan really was, other than loving the sight of you and how you moved so gracefully. I’m glad you enjoyed it though,” he grinned. “Because I think I just might have to try that again sometime.” He nuzzled against his lover, just enjoying feeling him close until his spent shaft slipped from within him. He reached for a towel and cleaned Haldir gently and then himself. “And I can honestly admit I am absolutely starving now. You made me work up quite an appetite,” he teased.

Smiling as Faramir cleaned him so gently, Haldir nodded in agreement. “I could use some food myself,” he sighed, reluctantly standing up and offering Faramir his hand to pull him to his feet. “We could always have dinner sent up here to our….I mean to your room, and not have to get dressed.” He’d almost blurted out’our room’, and could only hope Faramir hadn’t noticed. Sometimes, however, when it was just the two of them, it felt like they shared everything – including the room. Suddenly remembering his place, he had the grace to blush at his mistake, and quickly hurried to cover it, hoping Faramir wouldn’t be offended at his little slip. “Shall I tell the guards, or had you rather go down to the main hall, or…”

Faramir stared at Haldir for a moment as he’d said ‘our’ in reference to the room. He reached out and gently touched Haldir’s cheek, half stunned, half amused at the blush staining his lovely face. “I would rather eat here…in…our room. As…as long as you are living here it is your room too. At least…we share it together so…it is ours,” he almost stumbled over the words but tried to smile. “I know that here…it is difficult for anything to be ‘yours’ I realize that but…in my eyes at least, until the day you leave, this is your room as well.”

Haldir almost wished Faramir had been offended by his slip of the tongue. It would have been easier to resent his position in Gondor, to resent being a slave of all things. On impulse, he wrapped both arms around his lover and held him tight, swallowing the lump in his throat and closing his eyes. “Gods, I cannot believe I am saying this, but I am going to miss you when I leave Gondor,” he whispered. Though the thoughts of returning to Lothlorien aren’t all that appealing right now. “Thank you for being so kind to me. I wish I could tell you…or show you…how much your kindness and gentleness has meant.”

Finding himself shocked but pleased by the sudden hug, Faramir wrapped his arms around Haldir and simply held him. He swallowed hard, trying to keep from making a complete fool of himself by begging Haldir to stay or worse telling him how he really felt. “I’ll miss you too…so very much,” he whispered. He was unable to answer to anything else. He didn’t wish for Haldir to repay him for his kindness, all he wanted was for the golden Elf to love him.

“I am glad you will miss me,” Haldir confessed, surprising himself with his honesty as he held Faramir tightly. “I am not sure why, but…I am.”

Faramir sighed and pressed a kiss against Haldir’s cheek. He tried to smile and instead of releasing his lover he picked him up and simply carried him to the other room. “We won’t starve to death,” he whispered as Haldir looked at him with wide blue eyes and carried him to the bed. He just didn’t want to let his lover go for a moment after their admissions. It wasn’t what he would have liked but of course, that would never happen so he would take what he had and make the best of it. “You can’t say such sweet things and expect me to let you go afterwards,” he explained as he laid Haldir on the bed, and settled beside him.

Reaching up to run his hand alongside Faramir’s face, Haldir smiled up at him happily. “Then I shall keep saying sweet things, because you do not have to let me go anytime soon, you know. We still have a few months left.” The admission made him unaccountably sad, but one would only notice if they’d been looking in his eyes when he said the words. Quickly pasting a smile on his face, he blinked back the emotions he was sure had flashed in his eyes – emotions he neither wanted nor needed. “A few months that I promise to make good for you.”

Faramir was glad that he’d closed his eyes when Haldir caressed his face, because his eyes would have betrayed him at his lover’s words. “We’ll make the best of them,” he whispered. “Together, not just you for me…but both of us. I know you didn’t want to be here, don’t…don’t want to be here like this but…I’d like your memories of this place…of…me to not all be bad ones.” He opened his eyes but only met Haldir’s for a moment before he looked down trying his best to keep Haldir from seeing anything more in his eyes.

Haldir wrapped both arms around Faramir’s neck and pulled him close. “They will not be bad ones,” he said softly. “Despite everything, I am only going to remember how good you were to me, how sexy and handsome and kind and…and how easily you could make my body react to your every touch.” He paused for a moment, threading his fingers through now tousled hair and sighed. “And I’ will remember how much I loved mak…being intimate with you, not because you made me, but because I wanted to.”

Faramir buried his face against Haldir’s neck and breathed in his scent as he closed his eyes. “Then we’ll make sure they all stay good memories then,” he said softly and rolled so Haldir was laying over him. “Would you like to be lazy?” he grinned when Haldir looked at him oddly. “I can ask the guards to have food sent up and we could eat right here in bed.”

Idly letting his hands move over Faramir’s skin, Haldir nodded and pressed a chaste kiss against his temple. “I would love to be lazy with you. It seems like I have done a lot of that lately, but I am certainly not getting tired of it…”

Faramir smiled as his hands matched what Haldir’s were doing. “I suppose you have…would you like to do more? I mean…if you would, I hadn’t really considered it before but if you would like to at least go riding with me I don’t think it would be a problem,” he said softly. He’d need to assure the guards that Haldir would not try to escape, but as long as they were together…he believed he could trust that Haldir wouldn’t leave at least until the end of their agreement.

Haldir looked up in surprise, but nodded at once. Many of the slaves were confined to their master’s rooms or, at the very least, to the citadel, and the chance to be outside in the fresh air was one he wouldn’t even dream of passing up. Besides, he truly enjoyed spending time with his master, as ridiculous as that sounded, and though it would never have occurred to him to go back on his word and try to escape, but he was touched that Faramir had so much faith in him that he would even offer such freedom. “You would let me do that?”

“Yes, if it is what you want…I’ll have to assure the guards and my father that you would be with me and that you wouldn’t try to escape but yes,” Faramir said softly. The others would think he was crazy, especially allowing Haldir his own mount where he could so easily get away but he trusted Haldir. After all, the Elf had held a knife to his throat once and hadn’t wanted to harm him. He trusted Haldir, perhaps it was strange and maybe even dangerous for most masters to trust their slave, but they certainly weren’t typical.

Reaching down to entwine their fingers just as lovers would, Haldir smiled at Faramir and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “I would never break my word to you,” he said softly, meaning not only was he as good as his word, but also that he would never lie to Faramir. “I will ride behind you, or with you, or whatever else you would wish for me to do, but I would not even consider trying to escape, Faramir, I swear.”

“I know, I trust you, Haldir,” Faramir whispered drawing their entwined fingers to his lips and brushing a kiss against Haldir’s. He came so close to saying how he felt then, but instead he looked away. “I should go talk to the guards and have dinner sent up,” he said changing the subject.

Haldir watched with sparkling eyes as Faramir kissed him so gently, and reluctantly released his hand. “I will be here…and I will find us some books to read while we relax.”

Faramir grinned as he slipped out of the bed and picked up his robe. He doubted they’d get much reading done but didn’t mention that to Haldir as he belted the robe on his way to the door. He hardly had time to admire Haldir as he selected books from one of the shelves before there was a knock at the door and a servant brought their dinner. Just as Faramir predicted though, once they’d eaten, the books seemed to be forgotten.

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