Faramir Fiction Archive

Because of You (NC-17)

Written by Sairalinde and Anorienbean

24 December 2008 | 98532 words

Chapter 4

Celeborn had been watching over his warriors with the guidance of Galadriel’s mirror. His heart seemed torn in two with each and every loss, each and every soul that traveled to Mandos instead of returning to sail to Aman. He watched as a young man, a Ranger put his life before Haldir’s, and Galadriel had confirmed that Haldir did wish to meet his death in battle before Helms Deep was lost for good or won. Closing his eyes, Celeborn reached out to the younger Elf, needing for Haldir to follow his orders now. Especially now when Galadriel told him that it was not the night for Haldir to die. Even the young Gondorian seemed to know. Haldir.

Haldir almost skidded to a halt as he heard Lord Celeborn’s voice in his head. It was not often that the Lord of the Golden Wood used farspeak to communicate, and his first thought was that something had gone terribly wrong. Had Lothlórien been attacked in the soldier’s absence? Were the remaining Elves about to be ordered back home, knowing that the battle was lost? Aye my Lord. I am here. Is something wrong?

Many things, but ease your mind, Haldir, you are needed still in Rohan… but not as a warrior, Celeborn explained knowing that Haldir would want more details he continued on. Stay in the healing chambers; stay there with the young man who saved your life. Stay and protect him, the healers are unarmed… I do not know all of the reasons why, but you must stay with him.. Celeborn was unsure what the importance of the steward’s youngest son was, but Galadriel had said the young man had a part to play in shaping the new world, should Frodo destroy the One Ring.

Haldir found another alcove and closed his eyes, strengthening his connection with Celeborn. But… I am a warrior, my Lord. My skills are needed in battle, not nursing a foolish young man who was injured by his own impulsivity. He does not need me. Can one of the other Elves not watch over him if he is so important?

No. I do not know why, Haldir, but this task is yours. I cannot give it to another. You know that Galadriel’s mirror does not tell us everything, but you are the only one who can do this. You must protect him as he heals and return with him to Gondor when it is time, Celeborn explained feeling the frustration in Haldir. I wish I could tell you why, but I cannot, for I do not know… but the young man was right. It is not your time.

Of course Celeborn – by way of Galadriel – would have sensed his plans, Haldir thought. But if he did not die here, then the Elves could likely be called home… and to sail. And by the Valar, an eternity of life as he knew it now was not what he wanted. He was too old to change, too stubborn to even consider it… and so he would be stuck in Aman just as he was in Lothlórien, except there, he would have no one to guard, no one to train. He would truly be alone. ??My Lord… please. Please do not make me do this. You do not understand. Forgive me, but even in all your wisdom, you do not understand… ??

Celeborn could feel Haldir’s indignation, his frustration and an underlying feeling of fear of being trapped in a life he did not want. Haldir had always been a very different sort of Elf. He was not interested in the pursuits other Elves were, far too serious even as an Elfling. I am sorry, Haldir. You must do this. I have asked you… but I will order you to do this if I must.

Haldir felt like banging his head against the wall in frustration, but he could hear the conviction in Celeborn’s voice. There was no one else on all of Arda who could make him to do this, but if there was any loyalty in him, it was to the Lord and Lady he had sworn to protect with his very life. He shoulders sagged and he sheathed his sword, swallowing back his frustration. You leave me no choice. Never before have I questioned your orders, and I will not do so now. But never before has an order conflicted so deeply with what I believe is best. He sighed, turned back toward the healer’s quarters and nodded, though he knew Celeborn couldn’t see him. I will watch over him, keep him safe and return him to Gondor if it is your wish, though you know how this day would end for me if I were given a choice.

Celeborn frowned and sighed heavily. And it would have been the wrong choice, I am sure of that. Thank you, Haldir… eventually this will all make sense, Celeborn broke the link between them with that and looked at his wife beside him. “It is up to the Valar now for we cannot order him to love,” he whispered.

Haldir took his time, but moments later; he was back at Faramir’s side. The healer was still with him and it was almost startling how much paler the young Ranger looked now, compared to when he’d left him, though very little time had passed. “How can I help?” he asked softly, sitting down on the opposite side of the bed and wincing as Faramir moaned in his sleep. A nearby Elf under his command who had been injured looked up at him in surprise and Haldir glared at him until he looked away, then turned his attention back to the healer. “Apparently he is my responsibility now, so I may as well assist you.”

The healer looked up in surprise when the Elf returned, announcing his young charge was his responsibility. “Your… well… I… he seemed to take a turn for the worse after you left, his wound began to bleed badly when I attempted to rebind it… though now… huh… how odd,” the healer stopped talking then lifting the bandage. “It seems to have slowed again. You could help by watching over him, wipe his brow with this… he is starting to develop a fever I think and make sure he doesn’t thrash around. I have others to treat,” the old man said practically shoving the wet cloth into Haldir’s hand.

Faramir had felt adrift within his dreams, they were dark and then somehow, some way they felt lighter, he felt less unsettled and began to relax again. His conscious mind did not know that Haldir had returned but some part of him seemed to calm now that the Elf was there.

With another put-upon sigh, Haldir took the cloth from the healer and stared down at Faramir. After a moment, he wiped the cloth across a fevered brow and pulled a chair next to the bed, settling in as comfortably as possible, given that he didn’t want to be there in the first place. “You are already troublesome,” he muttered, as the cloth ran lightly over Faramir’s face and neck. His words were unkind, but his touch was still gentle as he continued. “And I have a feeling this is only the beginning.”

Faramir did not hear Haldir’s words but he felt his touch, felt his presence and something in him calmed completely. He loosed a soft sigh rather than a painful moan and relaxed against the cot, somehow knowing he was safe and would be cared for.

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