Faramir Fiction Archive

1001 Nights in Bed with Faramir

Posted 3 December 2010

Faramir is captured and brought to a distant land as a prisoner (Harad, Khand or any other place of your choice). His fair noble looks win him the favour of the local king, who takes the Gondorian prince into his harem. But soon Faramir learns the blood-curdling truth: the lord sleeps with a particular man only once – and on the morrow the unfortunate fellow is beheaded. The king had once been cheated on by his long-term lover, and now keeps revenging himself for his pain and humiliation…

So, by the time Faramir is called into the royal bedroom, he has a plan. After all the passions are satisfied, Faramir asks if the lord would like to be entertained by a story (let’s assume they, being noble and educated, have between the two of them a tongue both can understand). The king gives him permission to begin – but Faramir soon notices his master is getting bored, and thus the Gondorian decides to spice things up and add some intimate content. This reawakens the royal attention, and thus Faramir resolves to telling a tale from his personal adventures (which there were many of) – but in the most interesting place the morning catches him, and he has to stop.

The king is so keen on learning how the story ends, he decides to spare Faramir for the day and kill him the following morning, after they spend another night together, and the man finishes his narrative. But, naturally, the following morning comes right in the middle of another captivating tale of Faramir’s – and thus it goes on…

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